Sunday, May 22, 2011
One thing that we hear too little of in folkish circles is what the Christians would call peoples 'testimonies'.It can be both interesting and encouraging to hear how others with a similar Weltanschauung came to their current beliefs.
I am and always have been a spiritual seeker and being born in a Christian country I naturally began my quest within the prevailing Judeo-Christian religious hegemony.
From my mid teens onward I started to study the Christian Bible, first of all out of interest and then to seek meaning for my existence. At the same time I devoured books on Spiritualism, being convinced that I was a 'Christian Spiritualist'[if there can be such a thing].I spent the best part of 20 years studying the Bible and wandering from church to church, seeking answers and the fellowship of like minded people.I frequented Anglican, Evangelical Free Church, Pentecostal and house churches.
For a long time I tried to ignore the numerous errors and contradictions within the Bible, most especially the various gospel accounts of the life, death and supposed resurrection of Jesus of Nazareth.
A crisis point came in 1989 with the passing of my mother. Not only did I fail to receive any consolation from these so-called 'loving' Christians but for a long time I failed to feel at ease within the churches, having arguments and confrontations with other Christians over points of doctrine and belief etc. With the passing of my German mother I began to explore the history of the German people, starting with WWII and working back to pre-Christian times, the era of the Voelkerwanderungenzeit.I also started to master the German tongue and over the years from 1994 to 2001 I gained 3 qualifications to Diploma level in this language and qualifications in Dutch and Swedish. Since then I have also gained a Diploma in Rune Divination amongst other subjects. I also studied over languages; Old English and Latin. In 1989 I heard for the first time the music of Richard Wagner`s Der Ring Des Nibelungen and developed a passion for this music, sensing a strange affinity which could not be articulated with words. It spoke to my German and Germanic soul. My love of Wagner`s music led to an interest in and a study of the Runes and Germanic mythology which eventually led to my abandonment of Christianity and my turning to the religion of my Anglo-Saxon and German ancestors: Wotanism/Wodenism.
I felt within me an inner struggle between Jesus Christ and Wotan/Woden and Wotan/Woden won that struggle. It was the beginning of my awakening. I could deny neither the Call of the Blood nor the Call of the Gods. It was simply not consistent for me to hold to a universalist religion and a Hebrew god and maintain the folkish Weltanschauung that I had discovered. The inner tension that existed within me for years finally disappeared and has never returned. One does not 'convert' to Wotanism/Wodenism/Odinism one returns to it. For this religion is a part of our very DNA. As long as the Germanic people continue to exist our Gods will survive. However if our Gods perish then so will we as a distinct people.
Out of the blue approximately 9-10 years ago I received a mail shot from Woden's Folk and something resonated deep within me. I duly responded and joined that organisation as a Supporter, then quickly progressing on to an apprenticeship, becoming a Fellow of the White Dragon Kindred after my initiation and taking of the Oath of Profession. This marked a major turning point in my life for the first time I began to apply my knowledge in a religious way, worshiping the Gods, not just reading about them. My religion defines now who and what I am and all being well will define my daughter as well.
Woden is calling and his Valkyries are choosing His elect. Will you hear the call?